messed up.

i feel terribly messed up.
like a part of me is just seriously wrong.
it's not about wallowing in self-pity.
but it's more abt facing up to it.
i duno why i can never seem to get it right.
i need to be strong, i need to be positive.
but can i really?
i face my fears with uncertainty and paranoia.
i always seem upset or frustrated about smthg.
why have i become like this?
i feel so down. so negative. so low morale. so low everything.
i'm just so tired. perhaps not to the brink of giving up on life but jus generally tired.
i duno wads right anymore.
i dun want to care wad others think or judgements others have to pass.
i'm jus gonna be who i am right now.
everyone's gotta be selfish sometimes. maybe. i duno.

i'm sorry to have hurt people in the process of my self-discovery.
i'm sorry all these have to happen.
i jus need to learn.
i'm sorry i have to be so selfish.
you know this isnt easy for me.
i'm sorry but i just have to go thru this. alone. perhaps. i duno.
den again. wad do i know..?
i'm sorry i screwed up.
i'm sorry to mess things up.
i jus duno who i am anymore.